"for the happy, the sad, I don't want to be, another page in your diary"
Showing posts with label debauchery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label debauchery. Show all posts

Saturday, 4 January 2020

Nothing Pleases Like Maltesers

L’s Mother has been rather inundated with chocolate over Christmas and I am asked to dispose of it, which is a service I provide free of charge. Most particularly the 48 bags and 3 boxes of Maltesers that she received this year which is the outcome of coming out as a self-confessed Maltesers addict a few years ago. As they say 'Nothing pleases like Maltesers'.

I take a couple of boxes to work with me. They've not been opened yet though, it’s a bit early in the year for such debauchery. 

Not that I ever start the year with any New Year’s Resolutions because if you decide to give up your vices you don’t actually live any longer, it’s just your life becomes so tedious and boring that it seems longer.

On Friday I’m on the bike again, that’s the third time in less than two weeks, but it was hard and into the wind all the way.

Saturday is Parkrun again. It seems to be almost a daily occurrence at the moment. We run at Shipley Park and I remember why I don’t like it too much there as the second lap gets the Lad and I up caught in traffic. It’s still a Shipley PB for us though. Then I drop L at Pilates.

We stay in later ahead of Sunday’s Sherwood Pines 10k.

(Saturday 4th January)

Saturday, 26 January 2019

Expert Opinion


I would probably have been asleep at my desk on Friday morning but my thighs are throbbing so much that they keep me awake.

L suggests a mega hot curry tonight to destroy the remnants of her lurgy which is still keeping her off the tea. I shall get that cooking just as soon as I get back from setting up our dog show. I have the afternoon off work to head over to Newark to do this. The dogs are pleased as I am at home most of the afternoon before going over about 3pm.

The actual show is all day Saturday and I was supposed to be there for 7am but I’m late. In fact, I was worried I wouldn’t get there at all because almost as soon as I leave home the engine management light comes on in the car. I drive slowly, just in case it packs up completely.

Once there I do a quick google and the perceived opinion is ‘don’t worry about it’. I suppose we did once drive the old Vectra around Scotland for a week with the management light on but I didn’t expect expert Google opinion to agree with me.

The car has been brilliant considering it’s age. Apart from the occasionally dodgy handbrake, the most serious issue recently has been that the cigarette lighter keeps jumping out of it’s slot. The other day it jumped into L’s handbag and went to work with her.

This is the first time ever that I have gone to a dog show with no dogs. It is an advanced level show and MD is now too old to do that level while the Lad hasn’t got started yet.

At least L now seems well enough to exercise the boys, take in Pilates and a Jamaican lunch. It all sounds very cosmopolitan. I’ve had chips. I know my place. No cheese though, that would be unhealthy.

Meanwhile Derby win at Accrington Stanley and progress to the 5th Round of the FA Cup.

At the end of a successful show, I cross my fingers and put my faith in the car. I do kick myself for not putting my kit in the car, then if the worst happened I could run home. I do need the training. The car, however, doesn’t let me down.

Back at home, the current ‘night in’ tipple has moved on from the Mann’s Brown Ale, which was hard to get hold of anyway, to Mackeson Stout. Which L is now sending me for, to fuel our nights of debauchery.

Like Mann’s it’s 2.8% and one of my old university friends, who I still see, used to drink nothing but when we were in the Student’s Union bar, which was pretty much every night. Quite often we had to carry him home and I don’t think any of us had any idea what the strength was, I’m not sure they even had to tell you back then. We always suspected he was a lightweight. 

(Saturday 26th January)

Sunday, 25 March 2018

Unsane In London


On Saturday L and I head down to London. This is for the inaugural London Landmarks Half Marathon, that I got into but L didn’t. There was doubt that we’d get here at all due to caring for poor old Doggo but with him sadly no longer with us it frees us up to do stuff like this again.

So a weekend of dog free debauchery awaits although we’ll probably both sit worrying about the little tyke. Daughter dog sits and seems thrilled at the prospect of a weekend with the Lad. I’m sure she will video their day and keep us updated.

Continuing our London tour we stay this time at the Holiday Inn in Victoria which is less than a mile from the start. After a restrained Saturday night around Victoria, we’re already for race day. Well I am, L is annoyed that Waterstone's Piccadilly doesn't open until 12 noon. Quite right too, they probably all want to watch the race.

The race sold out in minutes when it went live last year although half the 10,000 places were kept back for charities which is very mean on us runners (but not on the charities obviously). In fact the whole event is ran by a charity, Tommy’s, but it’s an opportunity to run the sights of London without doing the full London Marathon. If you can get in that of course and this race looks like it could become as hard to get into as it’s big brother.

After a very early breakfast due to the clocks going forward, we head to the start on Pall Mall. At the start there is a sea of yellow event t-shirts which were sent to us in advance along with a nice drawstring bag also in yellow. Obviously I’m not wearing mine and be warned that, if like me, you have a yellow t-shirt phobia the colour is unlikely to change in the future but as there is yellow event branding everywhere.

There is supposed to be a wave start but this doesn’t really happen. You are given a start time and at about that time you join a long funnel which takes you to the start but once you get to the front, off you go, so it was more of a rolling start. Which was fine but it would have been helpful if they’d told us because some people simply slammed their anchors on and refused to start before their allocated start time creating a bit of a log jam.

As I’ve said we only had one place between us, so my number has ‘X’ on it rather than my name. Just in case L had to step in if I was injured but I seem fine at the moment. Someone shouts out to me ‘Come on X-ey’. Not sure how to take that.

There are ‘historical’ mile markers on the course, pointing out what they say are London’s quirky and hidden secrets. These remain hidden to me as naturally I miss most of them. Also some of the areas are apparently themed but again I miss out on these because I am concentrating too much on my race. I do spot most of the landmarks on route, although you do have to crane your neck around the odd skyscraper at times to see them and the route was very winding. I assume to cut down on road closures but I didn’t mind this too much.

The finish line was just outside Downing Street where I was handed a medal by someone in fancy dress but I couldn’t for the life of me tell who they were supposed to be. L would have known. It’s a nice medal but, as I’m not a medal fan, I didn’t really look at too closely. Apparently it opens up like a locket, so I must get it out of the drawer sometime and have another look. The goodie bag wasn’t too bad, containing some food and a sweatband, in yellow of course, which I will use.

Apparently the overall winner beat his Dad into second place, now there’s a obscure pub quiz question for you. I complete the course, uninjured, in 1:47. Not bad on little training.

Now what to do afterwards. We had looked at seeing the ‘Book of Mormon’ but with the cheapest tickets at £96 each we go for the cinema instead. 

Unsane is a thriller come horror that was apparently all shot on an iPhone.

Sawyer Valentini (Claire Foy) is a young woman attempting to rebuild her life, having moved to a new city to escape a stalker. However, she is struggling with that rebuilding job, finding herself unable to form relationships and seemingly constantly on the edge of a nervous breakdown.

She then inadvertently tips herself over the edge when at a counselling session she confesses that she sometimes has suicidal thoughts. The therapist promptly asks her to sign a document agree ing to more sessions but then, before the ink is dry, a man in a white coat leads her away to a locked room.


Unfortunately protesting that she’s been locked up by mistake just makes it look like she’s in denial. Then when she’s assaulted by another patient and fights back, it just reinforces the impression that she needs to be locked up and drugged up. Then when she gets side effects from the drugs, this is just another reason to keep her in.


With help from fellow inmate Nate Hoffman (Jay Pharoah), she manages to get word to her mother (Amy Irving) but she just comes up against the immoveable bureaucracy of the hospital. This all appears to be a dig at the American healthcare system, where hospitals can be paid handsomely through a patient’s private medical insurance.


Sawyer is convinced that one of the staff (Joshua Leonard) is her old stalker and who is therefore still stalking her. But do we believe her? Is Sawyer really sane or is she actually ill? The question of whether or not Sawyer is a reliable witness to her own sanity is the hook here.


Sadly the film then starts to go insane itself as it attempts to shovel something\anything into the large plot holes that have appeared. We can buy the incarceration idea for a while but by now basic logic says somebody would have got her out. The film therefore has to keep inventing twists why this isn’t the case and this just undermines the good story they had put together so far.

Luckily Foy’s performance keeps things watchable and the film is good but probably could have been a lot better. Nice idea, shame about the execution.

(Sunday 25th March) 

Saturday, 29 October 2016

In Some Style


L absconded to Rosliston Parkrun without me a few weeks ago but this week I finally get chance to tick that one off.

In some style as well. MD and I come in in 12th place. That’s not bad for an old git and his dog. MD is three seconds off his PB. That’s what a night of debauchery and Orkney Porter can do for you.

At the match Derby actually turn in a half decent performance and defeat Sheffield Wednesday 2-0. Apparently it's the McClaren effect but I think we'll hold off judgement on that for now.

Perhaps another night of debauchery will yield another 12th place tomorrow at the Sheffield 10k, although somehow I doubt it. 

(Saturday 29th October)

Friday, 29 August 2014

Not A Dinosaur In Sight



At least it's dry today. This makes the ride into work a lot more pleasant.

Daughter has a job in Manchester. Clearly threatening them with a baseball bat at Toys r Us worked a treat. Perhaps I should explain she had to pick a toy from the store and sell it to the rest of the interview group. Yes, she chose a baseball bat... and you wouldn’t say no to Daughter with a baseball bat. They didn’t even have to ask her what her favourite dinosaur was. I thought that always came up.

Sadly the ride home isn’t as pleasant as the one this morning. Ugh, wet lycra again. I’m just stripping it off when L sends through a warning that they’re bringing a guest back so to not be naked...

But later Daughter is off out to celebrate someone’s birthday, so then we can be as debauched as we like. Yay, that means a takeaway.

(Friday 29th August)