Little Man Tate

Kicking off the evening are the Shambolics from Glasgow sporting three guitars, a bass player and a drummer. A proper old school set up even if the third guitarist does dabble on the keyboards from time to time. Unfortunately this energetic group of lads were only entertaining 29 people. I know the crowd was that small because I actually counted them. It does get gradually busier and I hope the band is pulling them in as they are decent.

 

It is much busier for tonight's main band, Little Man Tate, who come on to the Pearl and Dean music, you know 'bah bah bah', which is in fact called 'Asteroid', and then Carter USM's 'Sheriff Fatman'.

I have never actually seen Little Man Tate live before. I followed them loosely in their early days but after releasing two albums in two years they caught me by surprise when they broke up the following year. That was in 2009. I vowed to right that wrong when after an eleven year break they announced their re-formation in early 2020 but then of course Covid intervened.

Now here they are in Nottingham on a UK Tour and that wrong has finally be righted.

They get off to a flying start with three tracks from their debut album 'About What You Know' namely 'Man I Hate Your Band', 'European Lover' and 'What? What You Got' before they do that we’re going to play songs from our new album thing. Which would have been fine had that first album in over fifteen years 'Welcome To The Rest Of Your Life' been out but it isn’t until next month.  

 

So to play no less than six songs that are unfamiliar to the crowd is pushing your luck a bit but if anyone’s going to pull it off its frontman Jon Windle who isn't a man who lacks for confidence as he tells us that the first of these newbies called ‘Cheap Stolen Kisses’ is about his now ex-wife having an affair with her boss.

It’s all very entertaining stuff and of course they do intersperse the new material with more familiar crowd pleasers. This though, as they play non-album singles 'The Agent' from their early days and 'Boy in the Anorak' that came between albums as a download, brings us to another problem.

They have always been a band with a liking for one off singles, B-sides, bonus tracks and downloads before they were as fashionable as they are now. Which was one of the things that drew me to them. The problem is after such a long time away, for a fair weather fan like me, getting hold of such tracks is now rather difficult as I found prior to this gig. It has to be said that most of the crowd, who know everything, don’t have this problem and clearly grabbed all this stuff at the time. 

'This Must Be Love' from their debut is a show stopper towards the end but the actual set closers are two newbies '23' and 'Beautiful, Deadly & Mine'.

Initially Windle returns alone for the encore to play a couple of songs on my own because, in his own words, he's ‘an egotistical fucking wanker’.

Of course 'Half Empty Glass' was a B-side albeit a brilliant one and 'You and Me Might Be Alright You Know' was available only on the iTunes version of their debut album. I think us fair weather fans need a rarities album.

A fan, clearly not a fair weather one, is invited up on stage to do ‘You and Me’ with Windle and does it some style. Then the whole band return for 'Sexy in Latin' and 'House Party at Boothys' to finish things off.

A Fictitious Dog Show

This week L is stressed about her job as she thinks her boss is about to pack it all in but then only last week she was so looking forward to early retirement. So I’m a bit confused but she comes home from work without her P45 as he says he wants to continue working. I’m not sure whether to breathe a sigh of relief or not.

L enters the Lad in a fictitious dog show that her friend the author is putting together. He should be a shoe in for the waggiest tail, that is if he’s not disqualified for not having one.  She tells the author that "he is beautiful but also pretty useless and is well used to being last at everything". Then she says that was actually a quote from me. If he can't even win a fictitious dog show then there really is no hope.

I’m so busy at work that I’m struggling to get away to make my cycling. Not only that it’s my Dad’s tea, his social night and his pint that's at stake. I make it in the end and we go to the Exeter afterwards.

L works from home on Tuesday and then is in work briefly on Wednesday but then soon home again when no one else turns up least of all her boss, whose TV is on the blink.

Wednesday is apparently World Menopause Day which I only know about because my company is celebrating it but then it celebrates everything. It's also the day of Storm Babet. No connection I'm sure.

I’m supposed to be out in the evening but my friend cancels, then un-cancels. I think he’s worried about Babet. Whereas I always assume these things are largely a figment of the media’s fervent imagination. 

We meet in the Alexandra where there’s a rather nice pistachio stout and then we eat in Pepitos, which was slightly disappointing because I know that the Indian Porter is currently on in the Exeter and for once I’m not driving.

L picks me up afterwards and saves me from being ravished by Babet which largely seems to pass us by or, as I say, she was largely a figment of the media’s fervent imagination. 

On Thursday I have another gig at the Rescue Rooms.

(Thursday 19^nd October)

The Derbion Headache

On Monday after my cycling this week’s pub rotation takes us to visit the Silk mill.

On Tuesday L takes my Dad to physio as I am stuck at work. He gets almost a full hour with the physio despite, at 95, not having a lot to complain about. Then he comes home with L as we’re off to an away match at Notts County in the EFL Trophy. I’m hoping it’s quiet as this is a Cup no one is bothered about. Yet the works traffic is bad for the early 7pm kick off and there’s still nowhere to park. Then I see a space in the street and we’re parked.

I have us seats on the second row which means hardly anyone is likely to stand up in front of us. Then the group of lads who are in front of us, who want to stand, let us swap seats with them.

Derby win 2-1 and then afterwards we have a beer in the Mist Rolling Inn as I couldn’t park close to any of the better pubs on Caning Circus.

L is in Cromford with friends on Wednesday which I believe involves bookshops and cafes, maybe even a bookshop with a cafe. Then she’s at her Mum’s, so it’s a long day for her. I have my physio which I’m persevering with but I’m now moving him to fortnightly.

Our evening walk is one of those where you put trainers on because the park is wet and you intend to stay on the paths. Then the deer force you to do otherwise and therefore you are forced to embrace wet feet.

On Thursday I’m tempted to drag L to the Robin Hood Beer Festival even though she’d hate it but it’s so difficult to get to now it’s at Trent Bridge. Then I realise that the lodger is at work so we can embrace Thursday as if it’s a Friday and we also share large Leffe. Then, just to add to the romance, we watch the first part of ‘The Reckoning’ about Jimmy Saville on TV.

L is at home all week, so she joins us on our morning walk when she can and she even joins me in the gym on Friday lunchtime where they have had some new treadmills delivered but what they need is new bikes.

In the evening we’re out in Derby for a curry with friends at the Spice Lounge after first having a beer in Suds and Soda. In the restaurant L orders Butter Chicken because she’s never had it and then gets accused of having baby food by the waiter. This seems an odd tactic if you want to encourage your customers to come back and I don’t think it’s going to work on this occasion.

I make my return to parkrunning on Saturday at Alvaston in a fairly tardy 28 minutes. Then I take my Dad for his flu jab in Littleover, which he whinges about because it’s not his usual surgery. Personally I’m delighted to go somewhere different and we get to go to the Alphabet cafe in Mickleover for lunch. Meanwhile L is in Derby acquiring what she calls the 'Intu headache' but is really the 'Derbion headache' as Intu are long gone in Derby.

In the evening L and I are in the Wollaton pub where I’m not sure I should have agreed to L’s request for a third Prosecco as I’m not sure this will ease said Derbion headache.

On Sunday we do a 6k run round the main Uni campus with the Lad, half a dozen cats and about a thousand rabbits. Amazingly my knees survive. In the afternoon we do a gym session together.

(Sunday 15^th October)

No Mercy

We don’t bother with an alarm in the mornings any more as 6am is, rightly or wrongly, hardwired into the Lad’s psyche as his breakfast time and he always gets us up. Well, he gets me up. Except that is when he doesn’t. For instance when he oversleeps after ‘tunnel night’.

Then we have to rely on L’s PT App which bings her at something like 6:27 every morning to do her daily check in. It has no mercy. Even when it’s not working properly as it isn’t at the moment. I seriously suspect it was written by the same people who wrote Trent Barton’s Mango App. Nothing goes wrong as often as that.

In the meantime she is having to do her workout from memory. Luckily the one exercise most emblazoned on her memory is the lying down hamstring curl which is her ‘favourite’. Some things you will never forget.

L is in work briefly on Monday and is then at home for the rest of the week as her boss is away. In the evening after my cycling, my Dad and I are in the Exeter.

L has her PT on Tuesday and I have my physio on Wednesday. Tuesday is also dog training where there are three tunnels in the ring. Three too many. Then I have a committee meeting on Thursday

L and I do a 5k run over lunch on Friday but we don’t do the gym as L is not feeling her best although she does still go for a swim. I had a sniffle earlier in the week but now L has inherited an upgraded version of it. To be fair she did try to fight off my amorous advances. Her version though oddly seems to include a nosebleed.

On Saturday we do our third tourist Parkrun in a row at Watermead Park, the home of the woolly mammoth that we can’t find. L is well enough to run but the Lad and I are again only supporting.

Afterwards I drop the Lad at home, L in Derby and then pick up my Dad. We then meet L and her Mum in Jamaica Blue for lunch where I have a full English but with healthy poached eggs before being called upon to finish my Dad’s pancakes. Shades of Scotland.

It is getting harder and harder to park in Derby since they closed the Riverside car park and then dug up half the roads in town. Today the Basement car park is shut because its full so we park on floor 4 above M&S which means a final coffee in BBs, as I believe those in the know call it. Then after dropping L’s Mum in Mickleover, we pick up the Lad up from home and then I cut my Dad’s grass.

We stay in as L is still not feeling her best and has another early PT session on Sunday. After which we repeat last week’s trip to Colwick where I run 5.4k with the Lad. After which we go to Beeston for coffee and a naughty bacon sandwich. I cut the hedge back at home before we then both head to bed exhausted but not too exhausted. We do manage a few drinks later in the Wollaton.

(Sunday 8^th October)

Joy Formidable

There is a very packed stage equipment wise for support act The People Versus and there are effects pedals everywhere. So many trip hazards. Do health and safety know? I hope the band are small in number but oh no. There are six of them and at the end of their set they do freely acknowledge that not many bands will take a six piece support.  

In Alice Edwards they have a strong singer but who seems a bit indifferent to the crowd or perhaps this is just self-deprecating humour. This does take the edge off what is bouncy and fun performance but they seem more genuine by the end.

From a packed stage to a very stripped back setup for the threesome that are The Joy Formidable on the last date of their UK tour. There is even more space on stage for lead vocalist\guitarist Rhiannon Bryan and bassist Rhydian Dafydd with their unconventional set up that sees drummer Matt Thomas positioned sideways on at the front corner of the stage rather than tucked away at the back. This was a nice dynamic but I think they've always done this. For me there’s no substitute for seeing a band up close and in full flow so this is ideal as you rarely get to see the drummer so close up.

I confess that it's been a while since I last saw them. Having followed them closely right from when they started in 2007, I haven't actually seen them live since 2010. I have missed out because they've always been, well, formidable live and, as I soon discover, they still are.

The Rescue Rooms isn't full but it's busy and it's quite an old crowd as well. Perhaps they've all been in from the start. Unfortunately things have never really taken off for the band. Despite regularly securing decent support slots and doing quite well in the States they've never been able to move on from relatively small venues in this country. Tonight that is to benefit of everyone who's here. 

After starting with 'Caught on a Breeze', 'Sevier' and 'Ostrich' they finally pause for breath and the first of many long rambling chats ensues. These are occasionally with the audience but mostly among themselves. One of these before playing 'Into The Blue' turns to how much Covid affected a touring band such them and then somehow in to a discussion about sheds. 

We get some of the 'hits' such as 'Whirring' and 'Cradle' then they play a Welsh language song called 'Y Garreg Ateb' (the Answering Stone), which was a total belter, and then an acoustic version of 'I Don’t Want To See You Like This' before they close with their new single 'Share My Heat'.

They return to play 'Little Blimp' and then the slow-burning 'Left Too Soon', which seems apt as a show closer.

They are still formidable and still deserve to be much better known than they are. 

Happiness At Work Week

This week is International Happiness at Work Week and naturally my company are throwing their all into it. Monday is Happiness Radio Day with a feel good music list that I almost gave up on after the first three were Steps, B*Witched and Taylor Swift but then we got Twisted Sister!

L gets sent home again when her boss doesn’t come in. He’s probably hungover from celebrating Wales massive 40-6 victory over Australia in the Rugby World Cup. In the evening it’s my cycling and afterwards a visit to the Alexandra.

Tuesday is Happiness in the Home Office Day. That is as in WFH not the Government department. Happiness today is dodging the rain which we manage to do on our walk but a work colleague of L’s isn’t so fortunate and is now walking around in L’s spare clothes. The storm is so intense the Lad hides under my desk.

I told L on Sunday that she was making the lying down hamstring curl look easy and lo and behold today her PT increases the weights on it.

In the evening we start the brand new Strike book the ‘Running Grave’ on audio. Everyone else we know is already half way through it. Daughter has of course finished it.

Wednesday is Smile While You Dial. I’m not really sure what that’s all about as I hate speaking to customers. L, who has another ‘day off’, goes for her regular-ish Wednesday morning run while I ‘save myself’ for the gym. Work is mad at the moment but I do manage to get to the gym briefly at lunch but couldn’t get on most things. I did get on the leg press where I’m not sure if I’m supposed to be concerned when other men compliment me on my calves. L swims with Daughter later while the Lad and I are at dog training.

‘Thankful Thursday’ starts as usual with our walk on the park. In the evening it’s the last tennis of the year because it’s now too dark to play on an unfloodlit court but the four floodlit courts are totally unbookable, there must be some secret society in charge of them, and the indoor ones are far too expensive.

‘Feel Good Friday’ is also wear yellow day but who would know what I’m wearing in my little home office and who would care. A feel good Friday morning rather than a feel good Friday night makes L late for her swim but hopefully it was worth it. We then run 4.4k together at lunch and are gym buddies again later.

There is another Golden Rams Coffee Afternoon for my Dad but I am off the hook for that as my Brother has offered to take him.

It’s another tourist Saturday and we’re Beacon Hill for Parkrun. This time I pre-empt the Lad’s histrionics and don’t even get him out of the car until everyone has started. There is again a nice café and then afterwards I drop L in Derby.

Derby’s match against Cambridge is rather dull 0-0 draw and is overshadowed anyway by the death of goalkeeper Josh Vickers' wife Laura. As a tribute the fans organised a standing ovation on the 31st minute, his shirt number. This sort of thing happens a lot, often for the most tenuous of reasons which are then quickly forgotten about. This however will live long in the memory. Never before have I seen both teams stop playing to stand and applaud, along with all the match officials as well as all the home and away fans. How Josh Vickers kept it together I have no idea but he was probably glad he was only on the bench today.

In the evening we attend our neighbour’s 80s Birthday party at the nearly Crown pub. We appear to be representing the whole street as none of our other neighbours make an appearance. Clearly it was just too wild a night for them with its warning signs about dealing drugs, it’s lack of real ale and an all brown buffet. 

Bizarrely they have Belhaven Stout on keg which I’ve just spent two weeks avoiding in Scotland. At an appropriate break in the proceeds we escape to the Wollaton.

Having missed a couple of sessions while we were away L has an extra PT session at 8am on Sunday morning. It was like getting up for one of those early starting triathlons I used to do. I pick her up afterwards and we head to Colwick for her swim and where I run with the Lad. This goes much better than I expected although choosing to start on the muddy path at the back of the car park was bad idea, grip wise. On the grounds of finding a secluded start place where no one would laugh at us, it was a success. There were also not 200 parkrunners to upset him and just one squirrel crossed our path. We’ve all earnt our afternoon in bed.

Then in the evening I have a gig.

(Sunday 1^st October)

Any More Sets

Back at home we do Parkrun at Clifton. I again run  with the Lad which is probably asking for trouble particularly as when warming up my knee was so painful I nearly didn’t start at all but it is better when I get going and we get round. 

Then it’s the match where Derby draw 1-1 with Portsmouth. Saturday night is spent at the Gym which leaves L dripping wet with sweat after a heavy cardio session. Nice. Meanwhile there’s me looking like a haggard old man doing a one legged weights session as my right knee proclaims that it did enough at parkrun this morning thank you very much.

On Sunday we’re back on the Colwick swim and walk but my walk is shorter than usual due to my dodgy knee. We skip the Daleside café and head home for coffee. I cut the lawn and then join L later at the gym where I do some upper body exercises as my legs have shot it. Monday morning’s walk is also a bit of a hobble.

The knee copes better with the cycling in the evening and the netball league is back on which is always good to watch when the actual cycling gets a bit boring.

My physio is on Tuesday this week and we do upper body because of my knee. Surprisingly I can still type afterwards considering he upped some of the weights.

L in is work but without any work, just keeping her boss company, still catching up on this blog, scrolling through Instagram and drinking lots of tea. 

Derby have a match in the totally pointless EFL Trophy formerly known as the Papa John’s Trophy aka the Pizza Cup but even they can’t be bothered to sponsor it any more. They play Exeter and win. Afterwards we go to the Silk Mill.

By Wednesday my knee is getting stiffer and it’s a tough morning walk. Later I do a light gym session, just half an hour of my greatest hits. The ones that aren’t too hard on the knee.

People do keep talking to me in the gym. Which is kind of scary, like I fit in. Although it’s mostly just everyone’s favourite catchphrase ‘you got any more sets’ or variations on that theme. This basically translates as ‘get off that piece of equipment, I want to use it’. When a girl with a foreign accent asks you about ‘sets’ it can sound like she’s asking you something else but no, she’s just after your leg press. Later it’s our first dog training session since the summer break.

Thursday is my Dad’s birthday and he freaks Daughter out by giving her a video call, an accidental one I assume. Most of us just got back what looked like a standard reply when we messaged him birthday wishes.

He was going to celebrate with a physio session but that has been cancelled. So rather than going around to see him in the afternoon to take him to that, I drop around in the evening with L. We take a cake with some candles on it but we don’t stay long as we’ve seen at lot him recently and I can’t face another evening finishing his chips for him.

We head to the gym and do a joint session although the new entry gates aren’t keen to let L in for a second visit of the day.

The Lad and I struggle to get in the park gates on Friday as there is chaos at the local Secondary School because their gates are locked and there is a massive tailback of kids with many climbing the fence to get in to school. They used to climb the gate to get out in my day.

The National Madison Championships, which was due to be at Derby Velodrome on Friday, are cancelled due to lack of entries after British Cycling refused to support their own event by providing some riders. It’s a shame as I was going to take my Dad.

L has drawn up a list of some possible tourist Parkruns listing those within an hour’s drive. Our first stop on the list is Belvoir Castle. I decide to watch and not run but have to boot the Lad while they start so that they call all hear the briefing. We then walk part of the course when everyone else has started. There’s a nice café for afterwards.

I then go to cut my Dad’s lawn even though he’s not there as he’s at a Classic Motorbike event at Cadwell park with my brother. Then I head home to listen to Derby win at Carlisle.

L returns home from her trip into Derby with her Mum with her usual headache. I take her to the gym to work out her frustration on the dumbbells. We had considered the cinema later but surmise that we both might fall asleep if we did. Instead we walk down to the Wollaton pub with the Lad. The beer is Lincoln Green’s Hood which is not too shabby and the Prosecco comes in smaller bite size portions from a large bottle. Although we have to send the first one back as it’s flat.

On Sunday we go watch the Robin Hood Half Marathon. I have my deferred entry but obviously attempting to run it wouldn’t be a great idea. I am very jealous of everyone while L is not jealous at all. We are slightly shocked how long the roads stay closed for some seriously slow walkers at the back. It’s one thing to walk it, it’s another thing to walk it that slowly.

In the afternoon I visit my Dad and take him to Notsa. Then in the evening my gym buddy and I are at the gym again. After months of trying to edge my barbell squat up to 20kg on each end I finally manage it. 60kg in total with the bar weight. 

(Sunday 24^th September)

September in Scotland (Part 2)

Week two kicks off as week one did with Parkrun. This time at Alness. It’s a really nice course out onto a land/sand spit with a 180 degree turn around a human dressed as a cone. I run with the Lad, starting at a walk after everyone else has gone. We gradually catch up and increase our pace. Somehow we stay friends. 

We have a nice coffee with other parkrunners at the Commercial Hotel then we drive to Dornoch beach via Tain where we allow the Lad back into the sea. We have a beer at a pub in Dornoch. In the evening we walk from the hotel to nearly Saltburn Woods. We have a nice meal back at the Ship Inn apart from the fact that both the ice cream and the orange juice are too cold for my Dad. Thank God for the Wild cat and it’s driven L to the Prosecco.

After hitting the breakfast buffet we drive along the length of Loch Ness to Oban with apples, bananas and other snacks rolling around in the car as my Dad has insisted on getting his money’s worth from the breakfast buffet. After a very hot first week the weather has now turned and today it rains most of the day. We pop into Nevis Range for a coffee and it would have been nice to have taken my Dad up in the cable car but at £25 each not cheap.

We reach Oban and check into the Great Western. L and I go for a walk and I check out the Fyne Ales in the Oban Inn. Back at the hotel L does her weights workout while I dabble and the Lad disrupts. We eat in the hotel and I find a very nice 14 year old Oban whiskey.

An ambulance rocks up later but it isn’t for me or my Dad but there are clearly a lot of potential ‘customers’ in the hotel who have had too many chips or there ice cream may have been too cold. Must happen all the time.

On Monday we spend a day in Oban without moving the car. L and I walk up to Dunollie Castle past a rocky outcrop known as the Dog Stone. Then we walk my Dad into Oban centre as far as the Oban Inn for first coffee and then beer. Unfortunately the Oban Bay Brewery that served us well last time is no more. After returning him to the hotel we then walk up to McCaig’s Tower. In the evening we go for a curry at Spice World which appears to have nothing to do with the Spice Girls. My Dad eats everything for only the second time, the other time being the curry in Stornoway when again there were no chips on offer. The owner bribes us with free whiskeys to encourage us to write a review online. I oblige as it was a decent curry. We have another whiskey back at the hotel.

We start Tuesday with a morning run. I am feeling my knee a bit so I only do 2.5k but L does 4k. Then we drive to Tarbert on Loch Fyne (the Tarbet with an extra r). We get the ferry across then head to Colintraive where we grab a coffee at the Colintraive Hotel before getting on the ferry to Bute. Retracing our steps of what was the Lad’s first trip to Scotland but in reverse. We grab an ice cream in the centre of Bute then head to our hotel, the Glenburn in Rothesay, which is mightily impressive place.

With the weather dropping colder having to warm L up between the sheets in the late afternoon has become a regular and rather pleasant ritual. On this occasion though we then have to head back into town to get the Lad some dog food, a dog cannot survive on chips alone, then we have what has become another regular ritual, a pre-Dad drink in bar. They have no beer obviously but do have Schiehallion lager in bottles which is at least Scottish. Sadly just like the Oban Bay Brewery, the Bute Brewery has shut down and overall there are far less bars serving real ale in most of the places we’ve visited compared to what it was when we last came up here.

Amazingly we manage another meal without chips and my Dad doesn’t get a dessert either as the staff seem to lose interest in serving us. We have a few whiskeys but L opts out, leaves us drunks to it and goes to bed.

Wednesday sees us do a car tour of Bute following the tour bus route that we didn’t think would take the Lad. He gets on the beach at Ettrick Bay, we have coffee at Kilchattan Bay, visit a book shop in a phone box and then have a beer (a real one, Jarl on handful) at the community owned Anchor at Port Ballantyne. L insists on again being warmed up in bed later that afternoon. In the evening my Dad finds another motorcyclist to talk to in the bar which makes for a long night as only one person in the conversation knows what he’s talking about but L manages to escape early again. 

On Thursday we manage another morning run, 4k this time before we check out. Not content with raiding the breakfast table my Dad steals all the toiletries from the hotel as well. We then get the ferry to Wemyss Bay back on the mainland. We drive done the coast to our final stop at Portpatrick stopping on the way down literally opposite Ireland at a tearoom near Turnberry.

The hotel is again impressive and has a great cliff top location, the harbour below is impressive too and on our last day delivers the best beers of the holiday where the Crown Hotel, visited on our pre-Dad trip, has hand pulls from Galloway’s Five Kingdoms Brewery. 

The best beer of the holiday comes at the very end of it. Our hotel also sells their beers in bottles and their Invisible Hand ale accompanies my evening meal. 

On Friday we depart for home via breakfast near Dumfries in the same roadside café\container that we have visited before.

The trip down the M6 is a nightmare but then what other types of M6 trips are there.

September in Scotland (Part 1)

Our two week holiday starts locally in Alvaston with Parkrun. Well it does for L. Despite making my comeback last week the Lad and I support then we collect my Dad and head north. It’s a decent drive up and we arrive in Arrochar in good time. We are again staying at the Claymore Hotel along with the coach parties of overweight chain smoking tourists. The set menu delivers a decent Spag Bol but the bar has no beer, not even the Loch Lomond cans of last time, and the wine is awful. I’m almost jealous of L’s fizzy water. We decamp to the nearby Village Inn for some decent hand pulled Loch Lomond Pale Ale. 

L's PT has done her a programme to take on holiday which means we have a set of dumbbells in the car and on Sunday morning we make use of these doing a weights workout in the hotel room before breakfast. Which is then followed by a not terribly healthy cooked breakfast.

After which we drive to stop number two at Morar. On the way we stop at a cafe in Arisaig called Sound Bites where my Dad has a mid-afternoon snack of Apple Crumble with custard. We don’t join him. We have vowed not to join in these indulgent mid-afternoon treats and save ourselves for dinner. This turns out to be a very decent meal at the Morar Hotel which features for me, and what becomes a reoccurring theme, Scallops and Black Pudding. They also have most of the Skye beers in bottles.

We don’t have breakfast at the hotel and catch a relatively early ferry over to Lochboisdale on South Uist during which we have the classic Cal Mac breakfast. The Lad stays in the car for the duration of the three and half hour journey but it’s last time he does so.

On arrival we drive onto Eriskay, from where the ferry goes to Barra, to get the Lad some beach but it’s not a Dad friendly beach, so my Dad stays in the car. Then we drive up through Benbecula to the Lochmaddy Hotel at the top of North Uist, a place that’s been on the to do list for some time.

L and I do an early evening 5k on the local roads, I mean road. Then we have a decent Sunday Roast on a Monday e.g. Beef in Red Wine along with more Scallops and Stornoway Black Pudding. There are no beers to speak of, so it’s on to the whisky. 

Breakfast is Eggs Béarnaise with yet more BP. Then as we’re not moving on today we head to Clachan Sands beach which is Dad friendly. He gets his chair out on the beach while I take the Lad for a run along the beach which has mixed results as we both seem to be playing to different rules.

Then L swims and I almost join her but I have a land locked dog and an errant father to keep an eye on, who at one point absconds into the dunes for a comfort break. Afterwards we have coffee at the Berneray Bistro café and then a cliff top stop where my Dad lusts after a 900cc Triumph motorbike a chap from Barnsley has.

Back at the hotel we do another weights workout and share a hot bath. A rare treat that we can’t do at home. L is also checking out Scottish gyms although I’m not sure they have such things here on the Hebrides. Folk probably just toss cabers.

After sharing a bottle of red with the evening meal, the lad rounds a pleasant day off by vomiting up his tea. He is promptly banned from finishing my Dad’s chips, which my Dad is ordering every night but rarely eating, and temporarily from beaches.

The next morning we head to the Berneray ferry terminal to get the ferry to Leverburgh on Harris which is my favourite Hebridean island. We drive along the half marathon route that we did back in 2012 and stop to use the toilets at the campsite we stayed on. Despite being my favourite island, Harris has nowhere dog friendly to stay that has vacancies not does its capital Tarbet have any cafes open that we can stop at. While the distillery, which is launching its first malt in three weeks’ time, has only three outdoor benches. All are occupied. So we continue driving to Lewis where based on past experience we believe cafes also do not exist.

After this longish drive we arrive at our Airbnb in Stornoway. There is a handy shop across the road from where we buy two pre-prepared curries to cook for tea. Then we go for a walk up to Stornoway Castle.

In the morning we return to Stornoway Castle this time for a 5k run and then have breakfast at Stornoway Golf Club. After which we set off to find Baltic Books for L and have a look around Stornoway which I still think is a bit of a dump. Beer wise the highlight used to be the Hebridean Brewery but that went bust in 2019. The only other bar that sells real ale and is still going appears to be The Crown Hotel but that is only selling Landlord and Deuchars. We go there for a coffee as we await the ferry to Ullapool. After his first ferry trip in the car, the Lad is now getting up on deck for each one.

Ullapool also isn’t good for beer. The Ferry Boat Inn has a hand written paper pump clip saying ‘6X’ but the bar staff don’t know what it is. I assume it’s Wadsworth 6X from Wiltshire so not really what I’m looking for. The Argyll Hotel has nothing at all. The Arch Inn saves me which has Cairngorm Stag on. I have a couple while L indulges in a Gin and Tonic. The Caledonian Hotel where we’re staying has Skye Red on keg which is better than nothing and the best Whiskey of the holiday in a 12 year old Glenmorangie called Lasanta that is matured in sherry casks. Very nice. Food is also good with the first Cullen Skink of the trip.

On Friday we have breakfast at the Bothy by the campsite we once stayed on then take a short walk along the sea front. Then we drive across the width of Scotland to Invergordon near Inverness for the only reason you’d drive across the width of Scotland. For parkrun of course and not purely for the excellent gelato some chap is serving from his van.

The Ship Inn where we’re staying has Cairngorm Wild Cat in bottles, Cairngorm Stag’s big brother, plus the local Dalmore whiskey. My Dad, seemingly intent on fattening me up, orders mac and cheese with chips and sticky toffee pudding to follow with no chance of finishing either. He then offers the leftovers to the Lad and I.

(Friday 8^th September)

Best Before End December 2018

Monday is a Bank Holiday so it’s a lazy morning in bed and then a not very lazy afternoon. We 5k run together on Martin’s Pond then gym together. In the evening I cook a healthy (hopefully) and high protein (hopefully) Thai Curry. 

On the healthy (hopefully) front L turns to Quinoa Porridge. The only problem is our bag of Quinoa is best before end December 2018. She doesn’t seem fazed but also doesn’t seemed impressed by her new breakfast snack and doesn’t ask for a fresh in date bag which might have made a difference.

On Tuesday I’m out with my Dad at the New Inn in Shardlow where they have Tiny Rebel’s version of Old Peculiar, that I mentioned a while ago and said I’d never see. Which is fantastic until you’re driving, which obviously I am.

L is still not well with an upset stomach, which she had prior to out of date Quinoa Porridge, and doesn’t swim or gym on Wednesday. I’m at Physio though where I am given a shiny new workout. The only problem is it’s all upper body. After which my arms ached so much that it took me three attempts to put the car in reverse to get out of the gym car park.

Quite how a humble physio session on my knee has now transcended into an upper body workout that ends with me doing something called snake wiggles on something called a battle rope followed by ten press ups, three times over, I’m not sure. Well, obviously he’s just extending his payday or he’s just an evil bastard.

I’m back at the gym on Thursday but not practicing my snake wiggles, just working on the decrepit old knees. In the evening we have tennis despite the iffy weather forecast. We can only hope that as they have brand new courts hopefully they won’t flood as much and if they do they will hopefully have brand new squeegees to mop them. In the end it doesn’t rain while we are there and they even put the lights on for us. I win three games again and celebrate with a Orange-utan (it’s a beer) in Victoria afterwards before picking L up from her own gym session.

On Friday L has brought forward her Saturday trip with her Mum and therefore leaves me to my own devices on the Friday lunchtime run. Predictably, without my pacer, I may have got a little carried away and run 6k. We do the gym later where we are both in awe of a girl reading a book on the treadmill. 

(Friday 1^st September)